18 March 2005

Guinness Turds

I think yesterday could possibly count as a crap day. I didn't pass my grading.

Although, I was amazed by what I failed on (not shocked though). I expected to fail on my total lack of ability to break wood, but I failed long before we reached that stage. Balance. I failed on balance, and not in a really obvious way like landing on my arse in the middle of something technical and martial-artsy, just general balance throughout. Although I do understand the cause of this - my screwball hips and knees, which sometimes don't feel like wanting to bear my weight, and wobbling crazily at the most inappropriate time. I think what made it slightly worse was the examiners decision to tell me before I'd completed even half of the grading. I understand why he did it though - he wanted to see my mental determination shine through, and I did my damndest. I even broke 2 inches of wood - a task I have never been able to do, usually breaking wood is my downfall.

I came out of the grading disheartened to say the least, but nothing to how I left my flat afterwards. I had the biggest argument I have ever had in my life, and was basically told I was a failure at everything by the person I care most about in life. Just kick me while I'm on the floor why don't you.

I can't be arsed anymore, I really can't. But I am proving my point about students not being a waste of time - check the time of this post. I am up, feeling rough as toast and trying to pass my first guinness turd and get to my 9 O'clock lecture.
Why are guinness turds so hard to pass????

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